And it Begins Again
by silver blood
Summary: Beautiful things happen in times of celebration. The gift of Christmas, the beginning of a new year, the romance of a wedding… and it begins again. Lit.
1. Loneliness Across the Line

**Title: **And it Begins Again

**Author: **Silver Blood (Yes, it's lil ole me again.)

**Summary:** Beautiful things happen in times of celebration. The gift of Christmas, the beginning of a new year, the romance of a wedding… and it begins again. Lit.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any characters, places, or things. Some of the ideas are mine; most are not. I am not making any money from the distribution of this story.

**A/N: **This is set right after the Thanksgiving episode—but April doesn't exist.

**Chapter One: **

Snow was falling, clinging to dark eyelashes. Blades of grass sparkled with moonlight's illuminated frost. Alone in the town's darkened square, Rory cried.

She'd almost missed the first snow.

The loneliness was overwhelming. For months, her entire focus had lain on a certain blond. To be fair, it hadn't been Logan's fault. The blame was solely on Rory's shoulders, and she was well aware. As far as others knew, she'd fixed her mistakes and her life.

But Rory knew; she was still broken.

Her quiet misery was interrupted when her phone rang shrilly, piercing the peace she'd been enjoying after being away so long. She hurried to silence the sound she'd recently discovered was amazingly annoying. But it was too late.

Her perfect bubble of misery had been shattered.

She wiped tears off her cheeks with her gloves as she checked her caller ID. She thought about ignoring the unfamiliar number, but her gut told her to answer.

"Hello?"

There was a moment of silent déjà vu. Suddenly Rory knew. She waited, unsure if he would speak.

"Hey, Rory."

For a moment Rory stood frozen in the middle of the street; a solitary silhouette against white twinkle lights and bright piles of snow. For nearly a minute she found herself entirely disoriented, shivering from something intangible. For now she'd blame the cold.

His voice made her feel as if time had been reversed and they were 17 again; it was now as unfamiliar as it had been familiar.

"Hey, Jess… You called."

"Was I not supposed to?"

"Well, I can't say that I mind. But you might ruin your reputation."

There was an incredibly awkward silence.

_Ouch._

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

"It's ok, Ror. I know."

She shivered at the nickname. Her teeth were beginning to chatter as she reached the steps of her front porch.

"I was going to just write you, but I thought it would be better to call… I'm sorry about being so hard on you. I was being a hypocrite."

When Rory spoke, he could hear the smile in her voice. It was a quiet, sweet change. But it thrilled him beyond words.

"No, you weren't. You were right. And thanks to you, I got my ass into gear."

"Yeah?"

He was grinning.

"Yeah."

"Huh. What gear would that be?"

She couldn't stop a ridiculous smile from overtaking her features. She'd missed his flirtatious banter.

"Well… I got a job at the Stamford Gazette, moved out of my grandparents' house and back home, arranged to go back to Yale, and… I figured out that you were right about Logan. He's a dick."

Although he felt a little awkward and unsure what to say, he fell back on the banter.

"Oh yeah? I'm so proud of my little Rory. It looks like you're all grown up after all. I may have to get you a treat."

Rory laughed.

"You're gonna get me a present! Ooh ooh—give me a hint!"

Jess tried his hardest to get rid of the grin that had entirely taken over his face, but he was feeling too elated.

"How about I send you a nice Christmas card instead?"

Rory was taken aback slightly by his response.

"Are you staying in Philadelphia for Christmas?"

Jess paused. He hated the underlying pity in her voice.

"Well, yeah. I've got the rats in my apartment to keep me company, don't sound so sympathetic."

She knew he had said it in jest, but something in his tone broke another little part of Rory.

"I'm sure Liz and Luke would love to see you over the holidays. Have you talked to them about it?"

She could practically feel his guard go up.

"I talk to them once a week, at least. If they wanted me around for Christmas they would have asked me: Luke wants to spend Christmas with Lorelai; Liz wants to spend Christmas with T.J, ok?"

Rory didn't think before she spoke.

"Well maybe I want to spend Christmas with you."

What followed could officially be marked as the longest thirty seconds in the history of humankind.

Jess didn't think he'd ever been more surprised in his life. She wasn't trying to backpedal, she wasn't trying to clarify, and for once in her life Rory had seemingly made a conscious decision not to babble. She simply left it hanging.

A smile slowly spread over Jess's face, and he felt butterflies start to swarm in mass numbers within his stomach. But when he spoke, his voice was even.

"Yeah… Okay."

**A/N: **So let me know what you think. I really like where this story is going, and I'm eager to continue. So tell me your opinions. I'm having trouble with the title. If you've got ideas, corrections, constructive criticism, let me know. I'll really appreciate it. Thanks. I know I have a weird style. You like?


	2. Cheesy Mistletoe Moments

**Story: **And It Begins Again

**Author: **Silver Blood

* * *

**Chapter Two: C**heesy **M**istletoe** M**oments

Rory peeked inside to make sure she wouldn't be ambushed upon entering before carefully opening the door. She closed it as quietly as she could, before turning on her tiptoes and quietly running into Lorelai.

"Who were you talking to, mini-me? Was it your loverboy?"

Lorelai's muscles tensed slightly, but her tone was light. Rory could tell her mother still resented the boy, but she was trying anyway-and that fact alone made Rory want to hug her and never let go. She knew that now was the time to come clean about the events leading up to her return.

"Um... actually, Mom... Logan and I broke up."

Lorelai looked hurt for a moment, with hints of relief in the bright blue of her eyes.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry. Why didn't you tell me?"

Rory fought off guilt. She didn't need to feel guilty about not telling her. Although Lorelai was her best friend, they hadn't been close lately. Things had been tense since she'd gotten back, though they were both choosing to ignore it for the time being.

Rory wasn't sure if her mom would explode just hearing Logan's name.

She sighed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know either until his sister called at Thanksgiving. We had this huge fight about Jess and he just... I don't know. We're over."

Lorelai's face was a model of sympathy and confusion.

"How did Jess come into this situation, dear daughter of mine?"

She didn't sound upset. She didn't even sound surprised, just a little worried.

Rory stared at her shoes for a full minute before looking up through her eyelashes at her mother and took a deep breath. She was going to try to get it all out at once. Even if it killed her.

"He came to see me. He wrote a book and wanted to thank me because he said he couldn't do it without me. So he showed up at grandma's and we went up to my room and talked and nothing happened or anything. Then we decided to go out to dinner the next night and Logan showed up when we were deciding where to go to eat so we all went together and Logan was drunk and he was so mean to Jess, and you know Jess- he doesn't take that crap. So he called Logan a prick and left. But I went after him and he yelled at me and made me reevaluate everything. When he left he told me happy birthday and said he'd call. So Logan and I had a fight. And Jess said he'd call and he actually did! So I sort of accidentally/on-purpose invited him to Christmas, 'cause it sounded like his Christmas was going to be sort of lonely."

Rory took a deep breath and let relief come.

"Rory! Slow down, child. Geez, now I _know_ you're my daughter! That was your longest babbling session yet. I'm glowing with pride here babe."

Rory took a deep breath and looked at the floor again. She studied the tiles in the entryway as if they were the most fascinating things she'd ever seen. For some reason she was desperate for her mother to approve. It seemed as if the rehabilitation of their relationship depended on it. She waited for her mother to speak.

"It's okay that you invited Jess. Luke mentioned to me the other day that he'd like to invite him... So don't worry. It's okay with me."

Rory looked up at her mom. She knew her face was painted with disbelief and suspicion.

"You... He's- it's... really?"

Rory rarely stuttered.

"Rory, do you think your beautiful youthful mother really holds grudges?"

Rory snorted.

"Um... Yes. You would. You still haven't forgiven me for throwing away your black slippers when I was 15!"

"They were perfectly cute kitties!"

Rory rolled her eyes.

"You shrunk them in the washing machine!"

"Kitty killer!"

Rory gasped.

"Shh... Paul Anka might be listening. I don't want him to feel threatened."

"No, no, no, It's okay. He wants death to all fuzzy things that aren't him."

The Gilmore girls looked at each other for a second before they both began to laugh.

Lorelai pulled Rory into her arms for yet another hug.

"Kid, if you can forgive Jess, then I can try to tolerate him. I just hope you know what you're doing. And if you two 'get caught under the mistletoe' I'm going to gag."

Rory turned to head to her room, rolling her eyes.

"There will be no cheesy mistletoe moments, mother!"

She laughed.

"Good night!"

* * *

It was three a.m. when Rory woke again. She had been having a dream about being attacked by a giant can of whipped cream, and something had woken her up. It took her eyes a moment to adjust to the dark room around her. She'd just gotten used to being home again.

When she finally located the cause of her distraction, it was at the same annoying ring she'd heard when Jess called earlier.

At the noise, she jumped at least three feet before groggily climbing out of her bed to pick up the phone.

"Die."

Her voice was a harsh croak, it's volume startling in the silence.

"Look outside, love."

"Finn?"

"Right you are. Go to the window."

Surprised, Rory walked to the window and pulled back the curtain.

Snowflakes the size of quarters were falling thickly through the darkness. Snow covered ever surface; at least three feet of it. Rory had never seen snowflakes so huge, falling so densely.

"Oh my God."

It was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

As she looked out, she noticed a light. It looked like an old-fashioned lantern.

"Come outside, reporter girl. I made you something."

Rory hung up her phone and giddily ran to throw her shoes on. She grabbed her coat and climbed out the window, heading towards the light.

Finn watched in awe as she ran towards him, the light from her window washing out everything behind her, making her glow like an angel. When she was finally close enough to see clearly, he noticed snowflakes had caught on her eyelashes and in her hair. As she stood in front of him, small drops of moisture glowed like diamonds in the dark. She was grinning, and incredibly surprised.

"Finn, what the hell are you doing here? It's _freezing._"

He smiled but shrugged.

"Of course it is, doll. But I wanted to talk to you. C'mon."

Without another word, Finn put his hand on the small of her back and led Rory towards town. When they got close enough, she saw exactly what he meant.

There was a snowman in the middle of the gazebo. He had a fancy cigar in one hand and an incredibly red beret atop his head. Rory could barely contain her laughter, and as she turned to thank Finn, he could see the glee shining in her eyes.

"Oh my God Finn, you're amazing."

Rory laughed and threw her arms around the Australian, who picked her up and spun her around. When he put her back down he started to lead her towards the gazebo. They sat on the benches for a few minutes just staring at the snowman.

"You're here by yourself?"

Finn nodded, his head down.

"Logan doesn't know I'm here. I'm not here on his behalf. I was just worried about you, love. It's been boring without you."

Rory laughed.

"I'm okay, Finn. But I'm glad you came."

Rory looked up into his eyes as Finn sighed deeply. She knew he was going to ask, so she gave him a prompting look.

He took the hint and heard himself speak before realizing he'd opened his mouth.

"So... What's up with you and Logan?"

Rory tensed. He watched as every muscle in her neck visibly contracted at the mention of his best friend.

She stood up and started walking towards her house, and Finn followed.

"Ouch, that bad... "

Finn had a sudden disturbing thought.

"Did he cheat on you? I'll kill the wanker."

"No, Finn... I don't know. He just... wasn't as supportive as I thought. We had a fight. I'm not really sure why we broke up, because he didn't tell me we _did._ Honor did."

Finn tilted his head to the side and tried to see into her eyes again.

"You don't seem too upset."

They walked for a moment in silence before Finn spoke again, his words surprising Rory.

"He misses you, you know. Said he probably loves you, but he doesn't know how."

But he wouldn't look at her.

Rory laughed bitterly. It was a strange sound; one she hadn't made much.

She wasn't normally one for bitterness.

"No... he definitely hasn't a clue."

Finn just nodded and walked alongside Rory before putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close.

"If we were in love, princess, I wouldn't let you out of my sight for a second. But that's not Logan. He feels like he needs to give you space, to test you. He thinks he needs to make sure you're really in love with him before he can love you back. It's all about control."

He paused again, unsure if he should continue. Logan was his best friend, and he wanted him to be happy, but he didn't want to hurt Rory.

He'd have to tread carefully.

"Don't get mad at me for asking, but did _you_ cheat on _him_."

Rory stopped walking and turned to him, as confused as she was angry. By now they'd reached her front steps so she spoke quietly, though her tone was harsh.

"No! Why would you even ask me that?"

Finn looked deep into her brilliant blue eyes and tried to judge her sincerity. He could tell she was offended, and nearly immediately felt guilty. He smiled sadly at Rory before making a statement that he knew was going to shock her.

"Because he thinks you did, darling. Good night."

Rory watched as Finn turned and walked back to his car.

It wasn't until she was lying in bed warming up under her covers that she realized that she'd never seen Finn sober before.

* * *

**A/N: **No this isn't going to be a PDLD. But I love Finn so he's going to be in this story. **Definitely Rory/Jess-centric though.** I'm sorry if you don't like Finn and I know this chapter wasn't my best, but I needed to get one out and the next one will have some Jess in it. Leave me a review, please. This was sort of a filler but it's got plot development... Give me some more ideas if you have any- I like hearing what you all think I should do! 


	3. Who's Buying the Condoms?

Title: And it Begins Again

Author: Silver Blood

A/N: Okay, I gotta answer some questions and say some thank yous. Just Hidden: Yes, Logan will be in this fic. He won't be a huge character but I think you'll be happy. I have things all planned out as to why Finn is there and everything. Pam Halliwell: PDLD stands for Punch Drunk Love Duo, which basically means a Rory/Finn fic. Quite clever, really. Thank you EVERYONE for your amazing response. You should be proud, your reviews pushed me to write this so fast.

Chapter Three: Who's Buying the Condoms?

Lorelai decided to let Rory sleep in the next morning, and headed to Luke's without her.

The diner owner himself came out and gave Lorelai her usual morning peck, but his eyes were distracted. And Lorelai only had ten minutes to figure out what it was and make it better before she left for work.

"Uh-oh, diner man. What's with the weird look on your face?"

Luke rolled his eyes at his girlfriend.

"What weird look?"

Lorelai looked closer, appearing to inspect every inch of his skin.

"I don't know. You're all... paranoid. And your eyes are glazed. Did you have a doughnut? Because when you go long periods of time without consuming sugar, such as doughnuts, it can make you do funny things. The glaze from the doughnuts must have attacked your eyes and made them all glowy. What are the sprinkles going to do! I won't date a man with multicolored hair, Luke. I have my pride."

He wasn't in the mood to be teased.

After serving coffee to an old couple he walked back behind the counter and leaned forward, towards her, as if he was about to uncover a huge secret.

He still looked disturbed.

"I called Jess today. I wanted to see if he'd come to Stars Hollow and see his mom and I, you know, family Christmas and all."

At this point Luke looked around, as if he didn't want any townsfolk to overhear.

"He said he's already coming. That he spoke to Rory last night and she talked him into it."

The brunette across the counter from him was still trying to figure out what he was so upset about.

"And..?"

Luke looked dumbfounded.

"Since when does Jess talk to Rory? How long has this been going on?"

Lorelai just grinned and leaned across the counter to kiss her fiancee once again.

"They just started talking, and I don't even think she's interested in him. It's so adorable that you're worried about Rory, but she can take care of herself. I don't think she'll let Jess break her heart again."

Lorelai failed to notice that he was refusing to meet her eyes. She just pecked him on the cheek and stood, collecting her things.

"I have to get to work. I'll stop by tonight."

Luke watched her go silently.

He wasn't worried that Jess was going to hurt Rory.

He'd never known it was possible to be completely enamored with someone the way his nephew was with Rory Gilmore. It was an amazing thing to watch.

Every time he called, Jess would ask about Rory.

Who was she dating?

How was she doing at Yale?

Did she have a job yet?

He'd been incredibly disappointed to hear about the rift between the Gilmore girls. Luke had heard the pain and worry in his voice the one time they'd brought the subject up.

So this time, Luke wasn't at all afraid that Rory would be hurt; he knew she wouldn't...

But he was terrified for Jess.

The kid just got his life together.

Jess was trying to talk himself out of packing early as he threw another pair of clean socks into the open suitcase on his bed.

He ran his hands through his hair, frustrated. He really needed to get it cut. It was getting hard to keep tame again. He'd have to fit that in sometime before the next Tuesday when he left for Connecticut.

A big part of him had been hoping he'd magically grown Rory-resisting powers since he'd been away; but he had to admit defeat. He would still do anything for her.

But Jess had made a promise to himself; he would not chase Rory Gilmore.

If she wanted something other than friendship, she'd have to let him know, because no matter what he still felt for her he had no idea where they stood. He didn't even know if she'd invited him to spend Christmas with her as a friend, or as something else.

He had a sneaking suspicion she didn't know either.

Sighing, Jess picked up the phone and dialed.

It wasn't technically breaking his self-imposed rule.

Rory was lying in bed, staring at her ceiling, lost again in her bubble of misery. At least this time she wasn't crying. She hadn't had enough energy to get out of bed to pull back the curtains, so light was just barely shifting in through the checkered fabric and creating mysterious patterns on her light carpeting.

When her cell phone rang, Rory simply reached out without looking and flipped it open.

"Yeah?"

"What are we doing?"

The previously immobile girl was now fully energized as she shot straight up in her bed. She hadn't been expecting to hear his voice. It was a bit of a shock to get used to again.

"Um... what do you mean?"

She could hear him sigh; his voice clearly strained. She could practically hear as he ran his hands through his hair.

"I mean... You invited me to spend Christmas with you, and I said yes."

Rory furrowed her brow and spoke slowly.

"Jess, are you okay? What's going on?"

He growled in frustration. He didn't know why he was getting so uptight, but he just needed to stop wondering. So he decided to be blunt.

"Do you want me to come as a friend, or something else?"

Rory swallowed thickly. She hadn't been expecting that.

"Huh?"

Playing dumb never had worked with Jess, and it still wouldn't. He just got more straightforward the harder she tried to avoid the question.

"What I'm asking is, do I need to bring condoms or not?"

Rory swallowed a startled laugh.

"Oh my God Jess, what the hell? No!"

She didn't know if she was incredibly offended or incredibly flattered by his brashness.

But she was more than a little turned on.

"Well you were doing that avoidance thing you're oh so good at and... Aw geez, I'm sorry."

They were quiet for a moment. Rory blinked at his apology.

"I just want to know where we stand, Ror. We weren't exactly clear in our conversation last night."

She had no idea what to say.

"Jess... I don't know if I want a relationship. I don't know if I just want friendship. I just..."

Rory bit back strangled words.

"I just want to spend some time with you. I barely know you anymore, but I know you're different. I think we should just see how things go over Christmas and then talk about this, okay? But... I have thought about it. About us."

Jess couldn't hold back his grin.

"Yeah?"

Rory's smile was a little more reluctant. She couldn't believe she was telling him this.

"So, that's supposed to make me not want to bring condoms? 'Cause you might want to think of a better strategy if that's your goal."

Rory laughed. He could still surprise her.

"No, Jess. I don't want you to bring condoms. Okay?"

He wasn't sure if he was disappointed or relieved.

"Yep. Glad we got that cleared up. I'll call you later?"

Rory bit her lip and grinned.

"Yeah, do that. And Jess?"

"Yeah?"

She waited a few beats, knowing she was going to surprise him and enjoying the anticipation.

"We can always buy them after you get here."

She imagined his eyes were the size of saucers.

"Bye."

As the line went dead, Jess still couldn't grasp the concept.

Rory Gilmore had just flung an innuendo at him.

And my God did it turn him on.

A/N: Moving too fast? I hope not. Review me. 


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